I looked into those eyes and I saw an absolute sadness. But there you were, speaking as if nothing had happened, contemplating to assure me that you are everything but crushed. My dearest, I know the taste of defeat, and no matter how hard you try to hide them, one who has been there would be able to smell it. But it is understandable for you to act like this; it is good to be positive, so you put on that smile on your face, but clearly you were struggling in convincing me that I should not be worried.
My dear, you should know by now that I am not that easy to be convinced. One look into your eyes and the seconds you speak; those are just enough for the sadness to be felt, flowing through my blood vessel, and filled the insides of the heart. I need not you to admit especially if you don’t want to, but I am hoping that you understand my intention — that I am here for you always. It is never wrong to feel the way you are feeling right now. It is never a weakness. Even heroes have the right to bleed. Ti amerò per sempre con tutto il mio cuore, non importa quello che accadrà.
Judging from the dark void of space between us,
and the deafening silence you’ve been slipping under my door,
I’m assuming it is not possible anymore.
You And I Go Shopping (by Lukes Beard)
I’m not you
I won’t promise and break
I won’t leave everything
It’s just not me
I’m not you
I can’t love and lose over and over
I can’t carry on emotionless
Because it’s too much of you I banished from me
I’m not you
because you’re what’s been plaguing me for too long.
I’d take a walk in the park, while walking, looking up to the sky,
perhaps there’ll be stars that night. But if there’s none, that’s okay,
because sometimes you can see the clouds here and there.
I want to run so fast until I am out of breath,
I want to feel the midnight breeze on my skin, that it sent shivers to my body.
Perhaps then go to a café for a cup of hot tea.
If it’s okay I’d want to see the city bathed in pretty lights,
as cars passed by, the feel of the cold of the night,
I’d stuffed my hands even deeper in my pockets.
But this would be meaningful if you were with me. Thus, I’d find you first,
just so we got to walk hand in hand, run side to side, have hot drinks together,
seeing the flickering lights on each other’s faces, linking arms, smiling.
I think I’m feeling a whole lot better. Sorry for being bitter, but it was the last straw, you know? So frustrating when you are repetitively being hurt by someone you like. The fact that he is only nice to me when he is feeling bored or lonely, is something I failed to see. I guess I was too busy liking him that I didn’t see that.
But now I realized how ridiculous this is, and that it is unfair for him to treat me this way, so I am in the process of undoing the feeling of liking him. Un-crush him, if you could say.
Somehow it still hurts, because he said he hates girls like me and then he was being all nice and friendly to all but ME. I seriously don’t get guys.
And why the hell I keep falling for insensitive jerks?!
Why do I feel like I am not getting any HAHA
I tried to reply to all of you, but Tumblr failed me. Hm. Wonder why. As for the question I posted earlier, I’ve wondering long enough. Reading your answers really made me think. :) I might have fallen for that guy, but that’s that. He doesn’t feel the same way.